Everyone finds comfort in different things.
For me, it's this: No matter what happens, time will go on. What I have for dinner tonight - where I go tomorrow - whether I get a job this week, or in a month - babies will still be born and old people will die, it will still rain and snow, be sunny and windy. The earth will rotate and the sun will rise, revolve, and the seasons will pass. Whether I die tomorrow or live well into old age the mountains and towns and countries will continue on.
My life is mine - my decisions are mine. They effect the people around me, yes, but even if I fuck up, they'll be okay. If I make the right decisions, I will be happy. If I make the wrong ones, I will die sooner. But each decision - no matter how big, how imposing it seems - it's just an insignificant little shift of an insignificant little being on a tiny planet with a tiny sun. So I should make the decision I want to, because it's mine, and because the only thing really resting on it is my life, my limited span of years, and they're not worth anything if I don't live them my way.
So what if I didn't go to school? Who am I hurting?
So what if I want to be an author? Who does it effect most?
So what if I put off job hunting for another week to be with Paulo? I love that kid.
What's the worst that can happen? I wind up working a shitty job for a few months while I hunt up something better? The horror, the shock - a nineteen-year-old looking for a temporary job!
So things are looking pretty good right now, all around. Because, let's face it - there's a hundred things I could do, and do happily. So to the people with the 'helpful' advice: fuck you.
Thank you, and have a nice night.
I know we don't know each other very well but nevertheless I saw this post and it screamed at me. This is exactly what I've been wondering and pondering about lately. My parents want me to get my MBA and Bachelor's in Psychology in 5 years while I want to double major in History and English and teach. Yet here I am, about to start college, getting my MBA and Bachelor's in Psychology. I'm scared shitless and therefore haven't said or done anything about it. Hopefully, I'll muster up the courage from somewhere and 'fess up to what I want and do what I want for me. After all, like you said, it is my life.
Oh, god. I was just telling Ryan last week that I've always wanted to ride across the country. But the expense - oh, the very large expense - of that. But still; I could probably make a bit of money blogging about it...
And Grayson would be the horse to do it on, if anyone was.